Mad Like Alyce

With everything I have endured in my chronic pain journey, nothing is more frustrating than the migraines that continue to plague me. While I actually have multiple day stretches where the burning in my neck, shoulders, and back will be completely absent (something I never thought would happen), I will suddenly get attacks from the monster that is still alive and well… my migraine monster.

Sneak attack from my migraine monster, hiding under my covers #migraine #migrainessuck #chronicpain #difficultday

A photo posted by Mad Like Alyce (@madlikealyce) on

A difficult reminder

In general, I know there are a myriad of things that can effect the frequency of my migraines. Hydration/lack thereof, stress, lack of sleep, over-stressing my back and shoulder muscles, and improper posture. The last one has really come to bite me in the last few weeks.

I lost my job back in mid February, and I immediately set to networking and rebuilding my personal brand. I would go to some of my favorite coffee shops downtown and work through the morning, enjoying coffee and the occasional quiche while I worked. Unfortunately, I had been letting my success with my pain blind me to the fact that I still needed to be careful to continue that success. Working at coffee shops was not ergonomic at all, and the pain and numbness in my arms began to return, as did my neck and shoulders.

A leopard doesn’t change it’s spots

One of the biggest things that I know about myself and still sometimes am very blind to is that I will push myself through things when I should be listening to my body. If you have chronic pain, you will understand the fine balance of needing to listen to your body and needing to challenge it to keep growing stronger. Its a fine balance that I had (kind of) managed to maintain… and somehow forgot yet again how fragile that balance was. I continued working at coffee shops and even with the growing pain, continued to push myself through the last 4 weeks of Farrell’s. In the last two weeks, my body was showing me a full on flare up, and yet I wanted to finish my 10 week session strong… which I did.

Migraine moving in

My migraine monster took this blatant ignorance of what my body was telling me as an invitation to move in for awhile, and I have been struggling since. While I feel like I have just about completed its eviction… it keeps on hanging around outside. Like wearing a hoodie, i feel a hood hovering over my head. The shadow of a headache, ready to pounce at any time. I’ve had to go back to a lot of my old techniques for managing my pain that I had let fall to the wayside in recent months, such as stretching, staying hydrated, using biofreeze or salon pas patches (topical pain relief), my foam roller, and countless chiropractic appointments.

Chronic Pain Warrior

So today, while my right shoulder screams at me and the shadow of the headache lingers with an occasional throb to make sure I didn’t forget about it… I put on my warpaint in the form of biofreeze. I remember that chronic pain is a series of battles, and this is just another battle in that journey. For all of you hiding under the covers today, for those of you battling through a day of work where every smell and every sound makes you wince, for those of you at wits end because of the pain… just know you are not alone. You may fight your own battles, but we are all in the same war, and we will win!

Hello!

Hi! I'm Alyce.
Welcome to my journey towards living a happier and healthier life while living with PTSD and chronic pain... and never letting it keep me from my passion for Halloween, cooking, and way too many DIY projects... all at the same time!

Costume & Makeup Tutorials

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  • The top 9 for madlikealyce! It has been a fantastic year, trying out all kinds of new things and really expanding on my love for makeup and cosplay. Thank you to all of my AMAZING FRIENDS AND FOLLOWERS who have been with me on this journey. I can wait until my shoulder has healed enough to get back to it, I have a whole LIST of things I am dying to try! In the meantime, I’m at least back to writing on the blog, so make sure to check me out there, Link in bio. ❤️ you all!
  • Sick day snuggles. But at least it’s my first day out of the sling! #countdownisover #pitbullsofinstagram #pitbull #drinkallthetea
  • My new favorite IG account... u need to scroll through these posts! #Repost @iamtheswimreaper (@get_repost)
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Lol #justbeingbasic
  • Bahahahaha too funny not to share! #followyourdreams #freddykrueger
  • When I first saw @miss_stryx post her challenge, it really shook me. What AM I most afraid of? My first thought... was everything. Which made me realize that honestly, my biggest fear is losing control of my PTSD. I was diagnosed with PTSD 9 years ago, but it  took a good few years before I really understood what that even meant and how it impacted how I felt each day. It took even more years of counseling and amazing support from my friends and family before I was able to really get control of it. I'm happy to say that I'm now at a place where I live with PTSD but it doesn't control me. That being said, I'm always terrified of what might happen if it would spiral away from me again.
My second greatest fear is something that has plagued me from my childhood, but became an outright phobia and trigger once I developed PTSD. That is a fear of needles.  Shots, giving blood, and especially IVs.  Then it hit me... what is the perfect combination of both of these  fears? A lobotomy. A very controversial treatment used in the past on people with mental illness, involving a huge needle. 
From that terrifying vision came an awesome collaboration with some really great friends, and filmed and edited by the INSANELY talented @jibclimmer to complete my first ever horror short film. I'm so thankful to have so many talented and wonderful people that were willing and excited about making this vision a reality. I hope this isn't too dark for you guys, but I totally understand if it is! The idea actually terrified me and I put myself in the very center of it! Ultimately, filming this was actually not scary at all, as I have such incredible friends, and I was in a safe space the entire time. This particular version of the film is not the final version, since we were limited to 60 seconds on Instagram. Very soon we hope to have the entire short film up and posted and I will make sure to let you all know when that is live on YouTube! It is with great pleasure that I present to you my entry for round 1 of the #StrykingFEAR contest.
  • What would you do if you foresaw the telling of your own death? Here are some stills of my round 2 entry for the #StrykingFEAR contest. To see  the backstory on my Undead fortune-teller,  check out my last post for a quick short film introduction. The 2 part tutorial video should hopefully be up on the blog shortly!
  • For round 2 of the #StrykingFEAR contest, the character I was initially least excited about was the fortune teller. Why? Because fortune tellers are usually great beauty makeups. While I love doing horror looks, I really can't say I'm great shakes at beauty makeup. And then it hit me... what a great opportunity to do something outside my comfort zone AND something familiar with a two part makeup? I borrowed a crystal ball from a friend, ordered tarot cards, and learned a little bit on how to do a reading and pulled together an ending to this fortune teller's story… or should I say beginning?
  • When your sling gives you a full blown chronic pain flareup. Laying on the floor with my legs up to help take pressure off my lower back, and mystic seems pretty concerned. Good thing I have episode three of the @girlinspacepodcast to listen to!If you haven't started listening to this audio drama, you need to check it out ASAP! #chronicpain #chronicfatigue #lifeinasling #girlinspace #findme
  • Good things happen when you leave the apartment for the first time in a week! These must've gotten dropped off when I was taking a nap, I opened my front door to find this gorgeous Halloween bouquet on my doormat from @bkbecker! I just can't get over those adorable bats!!! #ihavethebestfriends #halloween

@madlikealyce

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