Mad Like Alyce

So, if you are new here, I have been living with Chronic Pain and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome for quite some time now, and for the most part, I’ve gotten to a good place in life with it. You probably wouldn’t even know it if you saw me out and about. I actually have quite a few behind the scenes things I have to do on a daily basis to manage my chronic pain issues that you might never see.

Invisible Illness

To be able to keep up with my job, I have to manage my energy expenditure. Ensure I get enough sleep each night. I wear braces on my arms while I sleep to help my nerves relax. I also sleep with ice packs on my shoulders (at least until they thaw), a pillow under my knees, a chiropractic pillow and  if it’s a rough day, a heating pad. I also take medication for my PTSD, which is, as with any mental health medication, important to take consistently. I won’t go into a tailspin if I miss a dose, but it can sometimes throw off my moods and especially my sleep for a few days. Finally, I often use Kinesio tape, which actually is visible, but people are often surprised to learn I have nerve damage 🙂

typing with kenisio tapeWearing it as I type this post!

Its all about balance

That is not the point of this post. What actually brought it up was a conversation today with a wonderful friend of mine who is going through a rough time post surgery that has made her rely heavily on friends and family. Because I also had a reasonably serious surgery in the past year, she asked how I balance trying to be independent with asking for help. Oh man.

To start with, I am very lucky to have a wonderful boyfriend who brought me ice every day, did all of the grocery shopping, laundry, and walked my dog… for 4 months. He also slept on the couch for 3 weeks post op just to make sure he didn’t jostle me until I could handle it. He kissed my forehead while he pulled the pain pump tube out of my shoulder on day 3 and I ugly sobbed, cuz it was  gross. The tube removal, not the kiss, that was adorbs. You should be jelly. I digress… and apologize for the “text” lingo, it just felt appropriate.

The truth is, I really don’t like asking for help, and aside from Damir, I didn’t ask for a ton of help when I probably could and should have. I really had to think about how to strike that balance between asking for help and independence, and if I could narrow it down to anything, I would have to say… its all about forgiving yourself. When you have to rely on someone else, you often feel guilty. That you are taking their time, their energy, and that you have nothing to give back. That guilt can really weigh on you.

Ask for Help, and Forgive Yourself

But really. Sometimes you need help, and sometimes… its a LOT of help. Sometimes its a lot of help for a LONG time. But someday, maybe soon, maybe years from now… you will be in a position to help someone else. A kind word, holding the door, making a donation to a gofundme to help someone in need. Pay it forward at Starbucks, volunteer. Take care of someone you know who is in the same place you are now. Your opportunity will present itself. I am a firm believer that the world is full of flowing energy, and it is completely ok if you need to draw that energy from others for awhile. Just know it’s just for now until you can give it back, either to them or to others.

Its ok not to be “on” it at all times. Its ok to sleep for 13 hours straight if you need it. Its ok to have ask for rides for weeks or even months, have your laundry done for you, or have to call someone in your darkest moment for help. The energy will balance. Forgive yourself for now, and pass your gratitude forward.

P.S. I finished writing this last week at somewhere around midnight on a work night. The post got stuck when I tried to upload an image, and I had to refresh the browser. To my dismay, the post had vanished. I closed the browser, and my laptop, and went to bed. Defeated, I put off posting until today, when I was delighted to find this post had actually (magically) saved!!! 

Hello!

Hi! I'm Alyce.
Welcome to my journey towards living a happier and healthier life while living with PTSD and chronic pain... and never letting it keep me from my passion for Halloween, cooking, and way too many DIY projects... all at the same time!

Instagram

  • How appropriate that I dressed up as Sally at the haunted house last night, because I was featured as Sally on @liquidcosplay in the same day... Halloween no less! I love love love this costume, and it’s the one that got me started in cosplay and makeup. #halloween #cosplay

#Repost @liquidcosplay with @get_repost
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If you've got it, haunt it. Here's @madlikealyce as Sally from The Nightmare Before Christmas. 🎃 Visit her page for more great cosplay!
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#nightmarebeforechristmas #nightmarebeforechristmascosplay #sallyandjack #sallystitches #sallyragdoll #halloween #halloweencosplay #halloween2018 #happyhalloween #EverydayIsHalloween #CreepItReal #repost #cosplay #cosplays #cosplayer #cosplayers #cosplaying #cospositive #cosplaylife #cosplaygirl #cosplaygirls #girlswhocosplay #cosplaybabe #sexycosplay #cutecosplay #womenofcosplay #girlsofcosplay #curvycosplay
  • You would think that I would have done makeup on all of my family at this point, but sadly that is not the case, however, I was thrilled to have the opportunity to do my brother's makeup after the haunt had opened Saturday night! He managed to pull together an incredible maroon clown outfit, and I am really pleased how the makeup looks! I personally like the messier clowns, and it worked well to have brighter pink-ish hues toned down by smudges of black and watering down the paint overall. 
#clown #clownmakeup #hauntlife #hauntedhouse #halloween
  • My first ever zombie for Halloween was a shotgun bride, and although it was a real bridal gown with real shotgun damage, I just used 3 or 4 latex bullet wounds. It was fun, and a great introduction to using prosthetics, but it wasn't really accurate to what I would have had for damage with an actual shotgun wound. So years later, I made up for it by re-creating a more realistic wound of where the shoulder and partial face would have been torn up by the blast. Personally, this is my favorite zombie creation to date! #zombie #zombiemakeup #zombiebride #shotgunbride #zombiecrawl #woundmakeup
  • Ready for my closeup!!! Getting ready for Sioux Falls Zombie Crawl tomorrow!!! #zombie #zombiemakeup #zombiecrawl
  • OK you guys, this is where I love the internet. I created this zombie 2 years ago and had (kind of) forgotten about it until just this week when someone re-created it... and she is on the other side of the globe! Seriously, it made my my entire day/week/month, and reminds me why I love doing this. <3 <3 <3
#zombie #zombiemakeup #zombiecrawl #halloween2018
  • Its GO TIME PEOPLE! T-Minus 7 days to HALLOWEEEEEEEEEEN. Im running on fumes and caffeine, but it is 100% worth it. I love working at the haunted house, and am beyond thrilled about this coming weekend. I still have 2 costumes to finish and 2 zombies to do, plus some donut deliveries (a great fundraiser... friends scared of clowns? Send them donuts a-la-clowns). One more look at this first clown because I was obsessed with this wig from Rockstar wigs... I WILL find a way to use it again in the near future. #hauntlife #hauntedhouse #clowns #halloween2018
  • I had a request to recreate a clown mask as a makeup so it wouldn’t be as hot to wear in the house (swipe to see said mask), and it was quite the learning experience. I made this about a month ago when I was still trying to use the cream paints that the haunt had, though I’ve since decided to buy more of my own water paint to use on my actors. The base here was the basic white clown grease paint, and while I loved the coverage, it felt awful to wear, and it was incredibly difficult to add fine details with cream paint or shadows. So my first and last grease paint clown! 🤡 I still think it’s important to share our failures as well as the successes... this is still far better than what I might have created even just a year ago! #clowns #hauntedhouse #halloween
  • Hey Guys! I've been quiet on Insta so far this October, but its because IM SO BUSY and i'm pretty much in Halloween Heaven. Between finishing my first commissioned costume (its super simple, but I completed foam armor for the first time!!!) and doing makeup at the haunted house, i've hardly had time for sleep... and I wouldn't have it any other way. 
This is one of my first clown practice runs. I tried doing 30 minutes or less, and initially I wasn't planning on posting. Having a few days of the crazed makeup chaos that is getting ready for house open under my belt, I have a new appreciation for what details you can and simply cannot complete in such a short time period, and kind of like the grunge this clown pulled off. Not everything you will create is perfect, but thats how we all learn! #clowns #hauntedhouse #halloweenmakeup #halloween2018
  • I think this barrel look could make a great clown character.... am I going over to the dark side and starting to like clowns?!?! Only time will tell, and there are still 20 days until Halloween! #nightmarebeforechristmas #halloweentown #lockshockandbarrel

@madlikealyce

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