Mad Like Alyce

In my last post on Giving up on the idea of “career“, I discussed why I am letting go of the idea that I have any control over my career, and I am going to stop killing myself for jobs that aren’t healthy. Even good employers will always keep their business goals at the forefront… as they should! The mistake we make is that we get our self worth caught up in it all, when really it often has nothing to do with us at all. I’d been giving this a lot of thought, when I ran across this article on Bright Side called “Why Generation Y Is Unhappy.”

While there are parts of this article that I didn’t always feel applied, the general concepts rang true, and I loved the inclusion of Unicorns in the infographics. I think some of my abrasion comes from the tone of the article, which leads me to believe it might not have been written by a Gen Y, but perhaps a Gen X’er, and it felt a slight bit accusatory. That, or identifying with the Gen Y, I might have felt slightly defensive until I was well into the article. Either way, the crux of the article rings true.

The Happiness Equation

The concept breaks it down to a simple equation.

Happiness = Reality – Expectations.

It goes on to describe the construction of the Gen Y’ers family, constructed of WW2 grandparents, their baby boomer parents, and themselves and how the upbringing and culture of each generation has shaped the world of the Gen Y’er and how their parent’s lives and careers have shaped their expectations. How these expectations are incredibly ambitious, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing… but that it can ultimately have detrimental effects on our overall happiness.

Perception of Reality

The next part grated a little, as it discussed how as part of Gen Y, we were told we are “special”. I wanted to refute it, but it is true. My parents have always pushed me to never settle, to push forward, and been incredibly proud of my accomplishments. Accomplishments I had striven for since I am ambitious. Ugh… ok so it was a liiiiiittle bit true.

While I don’t feel I myself have quite as extreme of a perception as the case depicted in the article, the concept is sound. Even in college, we had this pressure to get out of school and conquer the world. This pressure to get married right out of college, buy a house, look successful. And with each success… we post it on Facebook. All of the positives, the accomplishments, we share. The downsides of being a 20-something young professional are left out. I would joke about how I would buy a bottle of wine every payday, pop the cork, and use it to wash away the tears as I paid my bills, but you certainly wouldn’t find any mention of that struggle on social media. Kidding aside, being fresh out of college is not easy, and the idea that it somehow should be easier by the time we are 30 is a dream.

I’m not trying to be a downer, rather, I’m just accepting that I have bought into that illusion… the pressure that I put on myself to be accomplished by now. The article uses great graphical representation to illustrate the feelings of inadequacy brought on by this constant comparison.

My Interpretation

This ties very nicely in with the feelings I have had as of late. Feelings that I am not living up to my parent’s expectations. To my own expectations. That my friends will pity me for not living up to these “goals”. Yet, pushing and striving towards these goals that I have sub-consciously created for myself didn’t make me happy. What I am starting to realize is that I’ve built goals based on what other people have expected from me, but not based on what makes ME happy. Working towards a goal that is not my own will never lead me towards happiness, and while I am not sure where that leaves me now, I know that I am still ambitious. I am still driven. But if I can re-direct those energies towards goals of my own creation, goals that will ultimately make me happy, I will be far more successful in my own eyes.

I’m not afraid of working hard. I’m not afraid of the daily grind… as long as I can live life for myself… with a few regrets as possible. You may not identify with this article. You might not agree you fit this profile, but I do think that there is a bit of truth, however small, about how we are not necessarily living our lives for ourselves but for the perceptions of others. If we can shift our perceptions, we can all come ahead on the equation of happiness.

Hello!

Hi! I'm Alyce.
Welcome to my journey towards living a happier and healthier life while living with PTSD and chronic pain... and never letting it keep me from my passion for Halloween, cooking, and way too many DIY projects... all at the same time!

Costume & Makeup Tutorials

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  • The top 9 for madlikealyce! It has been a fantastic year, trying out all kinds of new things and really expanding on my love for makeup and cosplay. Thank you to all of my AMAZING FRIENDS AND FOLLOWERS who have been with me on this journey. I can wait until my shoulder has healed enough to get back to it, I have a whole LIST of things I am dying to try! In the meantime, I’m at least back to writing on the blog, so make sure to check me out there, Link in bio. ❤️ you all!
  • Sick day snuggles. But at least it’s my first day out of the sling! #countdownisover #pitbullsofinstagram #pitbull #drinkallthetea
  • My new favorite IG account... u need to scroll through these posts! #Repost @iamtheswimreaper (@get_repost)
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Lol #justbeingbasic
  • Bahahahaha too funny not to share! #followyourdreams #freddykrueger
  • When I first saw @miss_stryx post her challenge, it really shook me. What AM I most afraid of? My first thought... was everything. Which made me realize that honestly, my biggest fear is losing control of my PTSD. I was diagnosed with PTSD 9 years ago, but it  took a good few years before I really understood what that even meant and how it impacted how I felt each day. It took even more years of counseling and amazing support from my friends and family before I was able to really get control of it. I'm happy to say that I'm now at a place where I live with PTSD but it doesn't control me. That being said, I'm always terrified of what might happen if it would spiral away from me again.
My second greatest fear is something that has plagued me from my childhood, but became an outright phobia and trigger once I developed PTSD. That is a fear of needles.  Shots, giving blood, and especially IVs.  Then it hit me... what is the perfect combination of both of these  fears? A lobotomy. A very controversial treatment used in the past on people with mental illness, involving a huge needle. 
From that terrifying vision came an awesome collaboration with some really great friends, and filmed and edited by the INSANELY talented @jibclimmer to complete my first ever horror short film. I'm so thankful to have so many talented and wonderful people that were willing and excited about making this vision a reality. I hope this isn't too dark for you guys, but I totally understand if it is! The idea actually terrified me and I put myself in the very center of it! Ultimately, filming this was actually not scary at all, as I have such incredible friends, and I was in a safe space the entire time. This particular version of the film is not the final version, since we were limited to 60 seconds on Instagram. Very soon we hope to have the entire short film up and posted and I will make sure to let you all know when that is live on YouTube! It is with great pleasure that I present to you my entry for round 1 of the #StrykingFEAR contest.
  • What would you do if you foresaw the telling of your own death? Here are some stills of my round 2 entry for the #StrykingFEAR contest. To see  the backstory on my Undead fortune-teller,  check out my last post for a quick short film introduction. The 2 part tutorial video should hopefully be up on the blog shortly!
  • For round 2 of the #StrykingFEAR contest, the character I was initially least excited about was the fortune teller. Why? Because fortune tellers are usually great beauty makeups. While I love doing horror looks, I really can't say I'm great shakes at beauty makeup. And then it hit me... what a great opportunity to do something outside my comfort zone AND something familiar with a two part makeup? I borrowed a crystal ball from a friend, ordered tarot cards, and learned a little bit on how to do a reading and pulled together an ending to this fortune teller's story… or should I say beginning?
  • When your sling gives you a full blown chronic pain flareup. Laying on the floor with my legs up to help take pressure off my lower back, and mystic seems pretty concerned. Good thing I have episode three of the @girlinspacepodcast to listen to!If you haven't started listening to this audio drama, you need to check it out ASAP! #chronicpain #chronicfatigue #lifeinasling #girlinspace #findme
  • Good things happen when you leave the apartment for the first time in a week! These must've gotten dropped off when I was taking a nap, I opened my front door to find this gorgeous Halloween bouquet on my doormat from @bkbecker! I just can't get over those adorable bats!!! #ihavethebestfriends #halloween

@madlikealyce

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