Mad Like Alyce

Giving up on the idea of “Career”

Lately I have been thinking a lot about what I really want out of life. I’ve been in my career for 6 years, and I was already burning out. When a friend of mine quit her job in September to take a 6 month break for herself to figure out where she wanted to go in life… I was sick with jealousy. I had been tired and frustrated. I felt out of control and trapped; spinning my wheels and running in place at the same time.  I’m going to be working for the rest of my life, and I was already exhausted.

These past few months have really helped me start to identify what I really want out of life. Meaning… I have no idea what I want. I’d worked so hard to build this elusive idea of a “career”.  I see it everywhere around me. People killing themselves to build up a career. But no matter what we do, how hard we push ourselves, a career should happen naturally… a series of jobs within an industry. You can have a “career” as a server.

So… what does make me happy?

Yet, even though my resume looks great, I wasn’t happy. Thinking back to the times I was happiest in life, I realized that the jobs I loved were ones that:

  1. Made me feel valued
  2. Where I was helping people
  3. Had great work life balance
  4. I wasn’t making as much money

The last one threw me for a bit of a loop, but it was true. The jobs where I have made more money were always higher stress positions, or for people paying more money because they had greater demands on my time. With my last position, I learned that there are some jobs where I simply wouldn’t keep it if I was making $1,000,000. For the longest time, I thought that making a healthy salary equated success… but I have even had my views on a  “healthy” salary challenged. Living on a lot less makes you think a lot harder about what you really need to be happy.

More than that, however, I realized a key difference between the jobs where I was stressed and unhappy and those where I was happy is that I was happiest when I worked at jobs simply because I enjoyed them. I wasn’t thinking about how much I made, or how it fit into my career path, or how it looked on my resume. I thought about how I loved who I worked with, loved what I was doing. And on the days I didn’t, I clocked out, went home, and went on with my life. I wasn’t worrying about how losing one job could irreparably damage my career or become a black mark to my resume. I wasn’t worried about losing health insurance. I was learning, and living and loving life. It was a job, not a career. I was driven, had pride in my work, and enjoyed my life a hell of a lot more.

Separating myself from my “Career”

The fact is, if money was no object I would continue learning. I would change jobs when things weren’t working for me. I wouldn’t be afraid of losing a job because I knew that I would just move to the next one… the next thing. Something that would make ME happy. I have realized that the term “job” has somehow (at least in my mind) been turned into a bad thing. A job somehow became the lack of a career. But the truth is that a job is for the employee… and the career is for the employer. I’m done subscribing to the idea of the career. I’m subscribing to the idea that I can get a great job, and be a great employee. The career will just happen naturally as the progression of jobs happens.

If I won the lottery, I would continue my education and would take jobs to enjoy myself, where I felt I could make a difference. The odds are that I will never win the lottery, but living to make myself happy… that is absolutely something I can do.

A light in the darkness

As soon as I made this revelation I felt more free than I had in years. I am watching friends and family around me killing themselves for jobs, making themselves miserable trying to get ahead in a “career”. We don’t get this time back. Not a second of it. I, for one, am done wasting it on anything else than being my best self. Both at work, and in life.

Hello!

Hi! I'm Alyce.
Welcome to my journey towards living a happier and healthier life while living with PTSD and chronic pain... and never letting it keep me from my passion for Halloween, cooking, and way too many DIY projects... all at the same time!

Instagram

  • One last look at this (insightful? Revealing?) makeup! I actually really loved the eyes by themselves, and they took a good 2 hours themselves. A good challenge in trying to make a flat art of round objects translated on a curved surface! #eyeseeyou #eyeball #eyes #makeupartist #inspiredbyart
Inspire by art by @xsullo
  • Eye see you! I also understand I’m not funny, it’s ok. 😂
This was actually a fun challenge, eyes are really complex and took nearly 2 hours to get them where I was happy. Of all of this, I’m really proud of the detail I was able to get in the irises of each eye, and my blocked eyebrow almost completely disappeared! This actually looks amazing compared to the first time I blocked them out. Yay for progress! #eyeseeyou #eyeball #horrormakeup #horrorart 
Inspired by art from @xsullo
  • I love finding inspiration in new places, and when @bearded_horror shared artwork by @xsullo a week or so ago, I knew I had to give it a try as a makeup! Seriously, such amazing art. I hope I did it justice! Check out their profile to see even more incredible works and compare to the original.
  • After this photoshoot im not sure how to go back to my plain black background... I mean if there isn’t ominous fog in the background, does it really even count?!?! #fogmachine #clownmakeup #scareactress #hauntlife #evietheclown
  • This is my level of excitement right now! The love I have gotten for Evie over the past few days have been amazing, thank you all so much! #clown #clownmakeup #clowns #hauntlife #scareactress
  • That’s not a Wiley grin, that’s me clamping my teeth together so I stopped chattering. This spring was BRUTAL in SD, and it was in the 30s when we shot this in an unheated parking garage. #clowningaround #clownmakeup #scareactor #scareactress #hauntlife
  • Evie is probably my favorite full-costume character I’ve created to date. It’s so fun to think a practice look I made for haunt last year will be a fully fledged character come haunt season next year! Also, I NEED these light bars @jibclimmer used in this shoot. If anyone has a few hundred dollars to donate to the cause just let me know. 😉 #clown #clownmakeup #hauntedhouse #hauntlife #makeupartist
  • If only @grave_digger_the_clown would learn to share, Evie wouldn’t have to steal his shovel! #justclowningaround #clown #clownmakeup #hauntlife photography credit goes to the incredibly talented @jibclimmer
  • Hey guys! It’s been a hell of last few months, but trust me, I’ve been busy! I’d like to introduce my newest character, Evie the Clown! Thanks so much to @jibclimmer for these incredible photos... more to come very shortly. #clown #clownmakeup #hauntlife

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